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Sunday, September 27, 2015

Now On To 2015

OK, I'll be honest......  2015 has just been a hard year.  A hard year for so many reasons.  But, at the same time a growing year, a year that I've really felt God's presence, a year that although it's been difficult, it's also been good.
I think the hard makes it hard to blog.  But, maybe it's more of a reason to blog.....a way to process feelings, perhaps?  I'm so determined to blog regularly, even if it's just posting a picture, a random thought, or a funny story of the kids.
I wish over the last several years that I would have blogged more, especially for the memories.  I feel like there's so much that I want to remember but am afraid that at some point it just won't be in the forefront of my mind any more.  There's so much I want to remember of the kids.  A lot of thoughts that I wish that I'd shared.
Hopefully, I can do better.
Anyway, I can't really go back and share all the feelings and stories of 2015 (or the last several years), but here are a few of the highlights of 2015:
- being pregnant with baby #3- this was my easiest pregnancy
- birth of baby #3 (that should get its own blog post)
- a trip to the U.S. after 7 years away (that also should get its own post)
- Jurnee and Joelee leaving day care and starting to homeschool
- Jackie joining swim team
- feeling closer to God
- feeling like I've grown spiritually
And some of the ways I feel like I've grown this year:
- learning to not speak so quickly when I'm angry
- learning to pray for/in a situation
- learning to find joy in the little things
- learning to make the most of each moment (still working on this one)
- being content
- learning that I love to bake (and cook in general) and love when people enjoy eating what I've       cooked/baked
And some of the things that are a struggle:
- feelings of homesickness
- feeling inadequate
- feeling invisible or insignificant
- feeling like I'm not a good mom
- fearful of dying before my kids are grown up
- feeling like I'm not managing my time well (or that I just don't have enough time)
- forgiveness
So, now the good, bad, and ugly are out there.  Now you know how to pray for me!

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