I love having all the girls home! I love having a full house! Most of the time I enjoy their noise and the fun they make.
But, I'm discovering that young children, although more work, are somewhat easier to be a "parent" to than teenagers.
For example, Jackie doesn't mind showing me that she loves me. I can correct her. She's teachable. She doesn't stay angry for long when I discipline her. She accepts what I tell her and tries to remember it the next time. Like when she removes her clothes before bathing, she is supposed to put them in her basket for washing. If she leaves them on the floor and I ask her if that is where they go, she quickly picks them up and puts them in the basket.
Teenagers, on the other hand, don't like to be corrected. They think they already know everything. And, discipline is somewhat of a problem. I find it difficult to spank a child that is bigger than me!
So, Esther is home and I am very happy to have her here. But, things change when the girls come home. Mary behaves different. Mary usually is wonderful with Jackie but when the other big girls are home, Mary doesn't want to be bothered with her. I've caught both Mary and Esther hitting Jackie the last couple of days. Now, I know Jackie can also disturb them. She doesn't want to sit still and let them do what they want to do. So, I try to keep her distracted. But, they also have to realize that she's a young kid and sometimes just deal with it.
Mary does ok when she's corrected. She tries. I hope she doesn't get influenced by her peers. Esther, just looks at me like I've grown another head.
Then on top of that she has a habit of sneaking behind my back and lying. Mostly about food. I pretty much let them eat whatever they want to but ask them to be reasonable. Like I don't see why someone should sit down and eat 5 slices of bread at a go.
Then when I ask her if she wants something to eat, she'll tell me no. When I leave the house, food gets raided. I'll come back and a whole bag of chocolate will have been eaten. She's the only one in the house. Jackie and Mary are still at school.
We bought sugarcane the other day and there was a small piece left. Jackie wanted to eat it but she had already had enough. I told her to keep it for after school. We came back and it was gone. I told her to ask Mary and Esther if they had eaten it. She asked them and both said no. How does it just disappear like that. I knew Mary had been at school and unless she had taken it to school, couldn't have eaten it. She told me that when she came back she saw Esther eating it behind the house. I didn't want to confront Esther because I don't want her and Mary to be awkward with each other.
Also, someone had sent me a package of goodies from home. I decided to keep them and share them with all the girls at Christmas time. I had hid them up at the top of one of the cabinets, over where the stove should go. It's not a place that someone would ever really look in.
Mary knew it was there and it has been there for about 3 months without her touching it.
Yesterday, I noticed the cabinet had been left a bit open. When I checked, I found several things had been removed. So, I decided to feel like a snoop and check the girls' things. Jackie is too short but I checked hers anyway. Not that she would have been able to hide it well since we share everything. I found it in Esther's things. I quietly removed it and then locked the rest of the Christmas things in my room.
Later, I told the girls that the things that were there were for Christmas. I told them that some of it had been eaten and asked each one if they had eaten any of it or taken any of it. All replied no.
Now I feel like I have a sneak in the house that also lies. So, now how do I discipline? I don't feel like I should still be having to spank a 14 year old. I feel like now it more of a heart issue.
The reason I say heart issue is because of attitude. Or maybe all teenagers just have attitudes.
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